Jokes on the Environment: Tall Tiger Tales

For some strange reason I get this rush of a chill down my almost non-existant spine at the thought of living beings vanishing forever, just so, one day. Being there one day, fearsome, beautiful, proud and lauded, and then gone – vanished forever. Can life be so fickle and so worthless to us ? So helpless as we make it seem?

Something called a Tigerthon starts all of a sudden. A magnificent cat is on the edge of vanishing forever they say. Something needs to be done so that the species may survive, they say. I guess, at this stage we want to be part of the event, be in the limelight. With all the media available it would have to be losers and all those that are no one who would miss out on not being onstage when History is in the making.  Afterall that majestic cat, so glorified by poet and writer, hunter and protector alike; so sought after – just a sighting of it so awe-inspiring, which we have been so overtly and with so much vehemence in pomp and show been protecting all these many decades, is finally hanging by its claws on the edge of extinction. That there are many other species long gone or which might so disappear which we may have failed to notice and to ‘protect’ so vehemently and with so much gusto and aplomb over the years is not important right now.(Who the hell knows too much of what variety of beings life sustains anyway). The lights are where the tiger is and that’s where we focus until the next time. And who knows , next time may not be the same Big event as The Tiger saying bbye.

There’s the bold statistic there that said there are only 1500 TigerS in the wild. Wow it would be real nice to have one stuffed for the grandchildren to see, when you tell them a Jim Corbett tiger tale by a crackling fire, to have them believe. Who will doubt that somewhere auctions are already on, trading at high and the bidding at a forever high. Tiger tooth, Tiger tail, Tiger Claw, Head, Skin, Bones. Theres nothing about Tigers that doesn’t sell. Now its going to be the stuff of History.

As for the guys crying Tiger Tiger … ( that does remind me of some writer having written something like those two words somewhere), like they found something new to do. HEY YOU GUYS WAKE UP. First let me remind you : The Tiger was ‘always’ an endangered species– has been for since my Daddy heard of its existence. It has for a long time been on the verge of extinction –  thanks for reminding us again. Project Tiger has been heard of by a large part of the concerned world – sounded good, like straight out of those Action movies. Save The Tiger. As well as lots of other slogans. Tigerthon does not sound too good under the circumstances – surely it cannot be that long a race. 1500 should not take too long you sissies! Surely you are much quicker and better equipped than those louts of the past! And India and ALL concerned nations and Organisations have been aware for a long time and have (without doubt) been doing EVERYTHING POSSIBLE to save that darned Cat. The facts and figures regarding these stupid animals that took up so much of space and money and planning and energy amidst  our already depleting land and other resources have been highlighted every now and then in the world forums and of course among the so concerned Peoples of India. Monies, have been donated often to save the poor critters. Funds have been raised. The so concerned Governments over the years have Financed and so have, I’m certain, those WWF, WTF chaps too, among all those unsung others. All having done their own sincere lot. And I have no doubts about the monies, that at least SOME of all that went into the huge National Parks, the research and studies, and all that had been considered essential and full of wisdom for the ‘protection’ of that animal pest that we have nearly done away with.

All those years and money and effort and we HAVE managed so far to keep the latest figure at 1500 in the wilderness. That stupid cat refuses to die. 

Now. All this noise all over again. One Big B growling, too, this time. What I would like to know and PLEASE, SOMEONE tell me, WHAT NEW THING are you planning to do? To finish with those last few darned cats still left, finally ?


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